2020 Reads

In one category 2020 was my best year ever: reading. I finished 72.5 books, my personal record. A lot of people have asked me how I find that much time to read, and I really don't. I mean, I don't sit down for 2 hour chunks in the day and just read, but I do build reading habits into my day. 

There are a few key things which have helped me keep a good reading pace. 

1) Reading sprints. I heard a tip to set a timer for 20 minutes when you want to read. I do this everyday at the start of Juliet's naptime. This is great because it usually takes her 10 minutes to fall asleep and I need to be relatively quiet for the first little bit since she has major FOMO, so reading is the perfect way to kick off my 'break' time. I also read for 20 minutes first thing in the morning and 20 minutes before bed. These little chunks lead to about 80 pages a day which puts me at about a book every 4-5 days pace. 

2)Audiobooks. I'm not crazy about audiobooks but they come in handy! I love to listen to something while I do chores, walk to the park, get dressed, etc. It also helps me to quickly get through books I want to read alongside Forest. He's legit a faster reader than me and can get through a 300 page book in about 2-3 days. He's starting to read wonderful literature like Land of Stories, Harry Potter, Mysterious Benedict Society, etc and I can't keep up when I've got my own 'to be read (TBR)' list. I will try to score the audiobook version of these from the library or with my monthly audible credit so that we can keep up our little family book club. 

I also will use audible if I'm reading a book that is over 700 pages. I am a slooooow reader and I don't want it to take me 3 weeks to finish one book, but I also don't want to be dissuaded from reading a lengthy novel just because of that. So I'll do whispersync which is a feature where you can switch seamlessly between the audible and kindle version of a book. Therefore I can read in my little 20 minute pockets as well as while I'm busy and on the go. It helps me to get through epically long books in about a week and a half. 

Whispersync allows you to seamlessly switch between audible and kindle versions of a book. It allowed me to finish Stephen King's 1340 page The Stand in less than 2 weeks. 

3) Library timelines. I'm totally double dipping the library's digital catalog using both mine and Forest's library cards to put books on hold. The loans only last 2 weeks and I usually have 3 checked out at any given time so it motivates me to stay on task! 

4) 'What should I Read Next?' podcast and facebook group. 

One of the things I love to listen to when I'm not listening to audiobooks is the 'What should I read next?' podcast with Anne Bogel. The format of the podcast is Anne interviewing guests about 3 books they loved, 1 book the didn't and then she gives them ideas for what they might enjoy reading next. I hear about so many books this way and it keeps me excited about reading. My library wishlist is always growing and my 20 hold limit is always maxed out. So in the spirit of What Should I Read Next I am going to talk about some of the books I loved and didn't from 2020. 

Best of 2020

Just Mercy by Bryan Stevenson 

This was the first book I finished in 2020 and it might have peaked there. I love nonfiction/jounralistic/memoirish books and in this one Stevenson recounts his experiences as a young black lawyer working on behalf of death row inmates in the Deep South. 

This Is How It Always Is by Laurie Frankel 

I was hesitant to read this one because of ALL the hype but wow, it was such a poignantly beautiful novel. Parents welcome a 4th son into their family who from the beginning insists that he is a girl. The parents grapple with how to best usher Poppy through her childhood and ever closer looming puberty. It gave me a lot of empathy for any parent in that situation. The book was 'knock the wind out of you' beautiful and I could relate in many ways with how hard it can be raising an out of the norm child, wanting them to just be who they are and not be squished into a label or box. 

Bad Blood: Secrets and Lies in a Silicon Valley Startup By John Carreyrou 

Investigative Journalism is one of my most favorite genres. This one was riveting! About a supposed phenom, Elizabeth Holmes, who was the mastermind behind a revolutionary blood sampling technology that didn't actually work despite the millions of dollars in stock the company sold. HBO made it into an equally captivating documentary called 'The Inventor: Out for Blood'.

Last Christmas in Paris by Hazel Gaynor and Heather Webb. 

Written in letter format, this follows two friends and their correspondence throughout WW I and the proceeding Spanish Flu. Lovely writing and a good glimpse into the history of common people living through a hellish time. It has tragic elements but still manages to be sweet.  

American Kingpin: The Epic Hunt for the Criminal mastermind behind the Silk Road by Nick Bilton. 

I told y'all I like investigative journalism! This one follows Ross Ulbricht (aka Dread Pirate Roberts) as he creates an online black market and then eventual FBI investigation that led to his capture and arrest. 

White Oleander by Janet Fitch 

This is an older book that I finally got around to reading. A heart breaking journey following Astrid, a young girl plunged into the foster care system when her mother is arrested for murder. This novel is gorgeously written. 

The Mother-in-Law by Sally Hepworth 

In 2020 I discovered Australian author Sally Hepworth and I'm pretty excited to read through her catalog. I think fans of Liane Moriarty will also like Hepworth's work. Her books have elements of mystery, humor, and complex family and community dynamics. 

Catch and Kill: Lies Spies and a Conspiracy to Protect Predators by Ronan Farrow 

Yes, ANOTHER investigative journalism book. Farrow dives into the culture of sexual harassment and assault in the media industry and his efforts are thwarted and covered up at every turn. A very ugly look at Hollywood and the media. Farrow's estranged father is Woody Allen so he has bit of a personal interest in exploring how powerful men get away with abusing young women in the entertainment industry. And it will make you not trust the media even more... Also interesting to watch Farrow vs Allen on HBO as a follow up. 

The Unhoneymooners by Christina Lauren 

After reading this light, funny, effortless romantic comedy I was surprised to find out the author was actually authors. Christina and Lauren are two friends who write many bestsellers together. Their formula works and this was a delightful read. I'm not into racy romance and I'd rate this one PG 13, so well within my comfort zone. 

Things You Save in a Fire by Katherine Center. 

This is another romantic comedy that was just a nice easy breath of fresh air in a troubled year. Romances are not my thing so they have to be worth my while and have a good bit of humor to boot for me to recommend them. 

The Dutch House by Ann Patchett. 

Ann Patchett is a genius. Everything she writes is a masterpiece. Period. The end. Some people criticize this one for being too slow and I will say that plot-wise not much happens, but character-wise it's brilliant and rich. I'll take sleepy character driven and well written over fast paced thriller any day, so you should be aware of that when reading my recommendations. Though I read this on my kindle, everyone raves about Tom Hanks narration of the audio version.  That's how A-list Ann Patchett is: Tom Hanks reads her novels. 

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That wraps up my favorites of 2020. There are unfortunately a few books I did not enjoy. We all have different tastes and I know 2020 was a year of extreme worry and preoccupation which undoubtedly influenced my attention span. However, if you find your tastes aligning with mine, maybe the following books are not for you:

A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness. 

People love this as a kind of paranormal romance for adults. I see the Twilight comparisons in that it involves a completely toxic relationship with a vampire. This novel was so slow and repetitive. There are 2 more in this trilogy that its safe to say I will not be reading. 

The kiss Quotient by Helen Hoang. 

You learn something new every year. This year I learned that there is a difference between open door (very graphic) and closed door (leave something to the imagination) romance novels. I also learned that I am basically a puritan and do not enjoy the open door type. This is *very* open door. Ick. There are 2 more in this series that it's safe to say I will not be reading. 

A Woman is no Man by Etaf Rum 

This is another one that got so much hype. I was excited to read it but then felt so disappointed in the writing. It reads more like a YA novel than literary fiction. I say don't waste your time. Khaled Hosseini covers similar topics (oppression of Muslim women) in a much more profound and artistic way. Just my (very unpopular) opinion... 

The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes (Hunger games #0) by Suzanne Collins. 

I waited so long for this on my library's wait list and then felt like I couldn't get through the book fast enough. Ugh. It was painfully bad and almost ruined the entire Hunger Games series for me. It was like the Gilmore Girls special all over again. If you can't enhance the story, just leave it alone. 

All Adults Here by Emma Straub. 

Here's an idea: take every social hot button issue and cram it into one novel so that none of them actually carry the weight they deserve. That's this book in a nutshell. So overcrowded and over the top. And I think it was supposed to be funny? It wasn't... 

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Sorry guys- I hate being negative about books and there were several I read last year that weren't my favorite but these are the 5 that made me viscerally upset, probably because my expectations were too inflated. I'm sorry if they were your favorites! 

It was hard to remember details about what'd I'd read throughout the year, so I may attempt to do more of a quarterly review. It's only February as I write this and I've already read 12 books (and 10 out of 12 have been great!). 

18 month Sleep Regression and Shipment update

So pretty much as soon as I hit publish on the 'things feel like they are getting easier with Juliet' 18 month post, things promptly fell apart. This started with prolonged middle of the night wakings. Like 2.5 hours of just screaming in the middle of the night. 

Juliet has pretty much slept through the night without a peep (other than jet lag) since she was 3 months old. If she ever did wake up, she'd just roll over and put herself back to sleep with little drama and no need for us to intervene. Both of my kids were super easy to sleep train and I took it for granted. 

So anyways, the night wakings happened and then resolved themselves, but as soon as they went away the nap refusal started. Again, since 4 months or so I've been able to put Juliet down awake for her naps and with zero fuss she puts herself to sleep for a good nap. So imagine my alarm when I went to do my usual laundry at the start of nap time and heard her screaming when I finished. I went right to her because it was so unusual, scooped her up and soothed her, put her back down and she rolled over and went to sleep so hard I had to wake her up after almost 3 hours to go get Forest from school. 

The next day, the same thing happened, so I went to her and soothed her but instead of laying back down after a check in from mom, she proceeded to SCREAM for an hour. I was doing graduated check ins (go in and comfort at elongated intervals), which is how we sleep trained the kids (which honestly, we never had to do more than one check in with either kid because they were super easy on us and I didn't realize what a wuss I am!). She never laid down or stopped crying to entire time and my brief check ins seemed to upset her more. 

This happened for the next 5 days! She'd cry for an hour and then I'd relent and rock or wear her for a cat nap. 

Finally at day 5 I switched to extinction (it's time for nap, I'll see you in an hour...and just don't go back in until the 'nap' is over). The first day of this, she stood up and cried the whole time. 

The next day I gave her Tylenol as a Hail Mary (maybe teething/ear ache?) and told her bunny needed a nap so she had to be quiet and lay down and snuggle bunny so that bunny got her rest and y'all...she laid right down without a peep and slept 2.5 hours. 

Then that night she was up for 2.5 hours screaming in the middle of the night- which I also used extinction and ignored. IT WAS ROUGH. The next day I gave Tylenol again for nap, but no dice. She screamed for an hour and a half. And that was after not sleeping well that night. We were both a mess. 

She slept well that night, took a nap the next day, but then had another prolonged night waking and 2 additional brief wakings. 

our week from H E double hockey sticks. 

I was freaking out! I contacted a sleep consultant for a consultation. She said to  keep doing extinction and to give it a week. Offer brief car naps and early bedtime on the days she refused to nap and then touch base with her in a week to see if anything else needed to change. 

I don't want to talk about fight club and I'm still feeling really uneasy about everything, but the last few days she is back to sleeping 11ish hours at night and taking 2ish hour naps. 

getting better! 

She's even started staying calm and quiet upon waking where she had gotten into a habit of waking up screaming from naps and in the morning until I went to get her. I'm cautiously hopeful that we are coming through the 18 month regression. It was one of my hardest weeks as a parent. I would just go into Forest's fort off of his room and turn on white noise to drown out the crying and read my bible and pray and cry. I had heard of the regression but thought that only happened to babies who weren't on good schedules or who weren't sleep trained yet. Consider me humbled!

In other news, we have some updates on our shipment. While we still haven't heard about the official status of our container, when we entered our container number into the ship's database it said our container was thought to be in the hold and therefore on board and minimally damaged. Hooray! 

The only problem is, they are unloading the ship at a snail's pace. They have to unload every container before they can re-ship them. There are 4,000ish to unload and they are doing this at a pace of about 10 per day. Once it leaves Japan it will be another 6-10 weeks before it arrives in California. It could feasibly be 2022 before this happens. 

Since it's costing Jon's company an arm and a leg to rent us minimal furniture, they decided instead to offer us a payout to go ahead and replace anything we can't live without. They will also help up discard of any duplicate stuff that we are unable to sell/donate once our shipment arrives. This is really the best case scenario of the worst case scenarios! 

We have furniture in storage coming from Houston so will have beds and dressers for us and Forest (but no mattresses). That should arrive next week and then they'll come and pick up the rental stuff.  We bought a used glider, changing table, and crib for Juliet (who is actually still sleeping in the pack n play because we didn't want to change anything during a regression- I'm super nervous to change anything up now because I get super superstitious when it comes to baby sleep!). 

We bought a nice couch, cookware, tableware, towels, bedding, etc. We need a dining table and barstools but we can't find anything we like that is available before June which kind of defeats the purpose. We love our table that's coming but we are worried that after being in Thailand without A/C (was in our nanny's kitchen) and then in a shipping container for possibly a year, it's gonna be in pretty bad shape once it arrives, so we want to go ahead and just replace it just in case. 

our perfectly cozily rumpled restoration hardware cloud couch for the family room

great for snuggling up for movie time. And yes, we were crazy to get white.  Especially in a room off of the kitchen and backyard. It's performance fabric but I still feel totally uptight about it! 

You don't realize how much stuff you need to make a house a home until you have to replace it all in one fell swoop. We are super thankful this happened on this side vs happening while we were living in Thailand. Target, homegoods and pottery barn make this a lot easier! 

Little J just woke from her 2.5 hour siesta. If she continues to nap well I'll do a little post on our house and neighborhood soon!